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 while you debate half-empty or half-full., delilah!
peter summers
 Posted: Apr 13 2017, 12:14 AM
Quote
has Rep: 4 pts
I bow down to pray I try to make the worse seem better Lord show me the way To cut through all this worn out leather I've got a hundred million reasons to walk away But baby I just need one good one to stay
age
22 YEARS OLD
job
student
daniel's pack
aff.
jade
alias
27
posts




I'm a war of head versus heart And it's always this way
Peter often took a detour through Kensington Gardens to get from one side of the city to the nearest tube station. He had been in a bookstore, picking up an order, and although he could have walked some way to the next stop, he was more confident with this one in question, so he saw no reason not to head that way. The weather couldn’t seem to make its mind up, so he had wrapped up fairly warm for the winds and been slightly weirded out whenever there were pockets of actual heat. Having taken this route several times- and having explored Kensington Gardens enough in his life- he didn’t need his phone out to navigate him, nor did he bother to look at the signs too much; he merely avoided the slightly larger crowds of tourists, made sure he didn’t bump into anyone, and continued at a rather leisurely pace to the other side of the park. In fact, he only paused near the fountains when a ball seemed to arrive out of nowhere and, rather than allow it to hit the water (it could harm the wildlife! There would be a rather unhappy child somewhere!), he caught it, looking around to see where it had come from. It was a rather threadbare old thing, well-used, and he couldn’t work out where the appropriate person was for it.

After some confused peering around, feeling slightly strange for standing there with a ball in hand that didn’t belong to him, a child finally ran up and he sighed in mild relief, already fixing a polite smile on his face. He had already handed it over with a rather polite, “Here you go,” when the smile froze as he had a sudden flash of recognition. He didn’t like these moments; he didn’t like thinking of things that shouldn’t be, and it stood to reason that the little girl in front of him, despite looking rather sweet, was one of those things. They didn’t even mention his eldest sister; she had, when Peter was eighteen, been rather effectively removed from his life. But every now and then, through sheer luck, they would cross paths again, and he would think, oh no, and what do I do? “Uh, where’s your mom?” he asked, still sounding rather friendly to the little girl, if wary.

lilah / clothes /

--------------------
and soon everybody will ask what became of you -
user posted image
'cause your heart was dying fast and you didn't know what to do.
PMEmail
^
delilah summers
 Posted: Apr 13 2017, 07:16 PM
Quote
has Rep: 4 pts
I couldn't tell you Why she felt that way She felt it everyday And I couldn't help her I just watched her make The same mistakes again
age
28 YEARS OLD
job
waitress
gerard's pack
aff.
vicki
alias
76
posts




cause i was raised to up
to be admired, to be noticed
Kensington Gardens was a beautiful place. When it was sunny and warm and you could sit and eat ice-cream and people watch. Not when the wind was biting one minute, and then a mini-heatwave was beating on them the next. But Alice had been insistent that they go to the ‘park’ to play and Lilah wasn’t about to deny her only request that day. She’d been good all week, especially when Lilah had been worn out, happily playing with her crayons and letting Lilah sit down and relax. So Kensington Gardens had been the destination choice and Lilah was currently watching her daughter play with the worn out ball she’d had for a few years. Sat down on a bench with a Starbucks in her hand, she smiled as she looked on, seeing Alice smile and laugh. She had been lucky with Alice. Her daughter never moaned about not having new clothes or toys, or asked why they lived in such a small, dingy flat when all her friends had big houses. She never even asked where her daddy was, which was a welcome relief to Lilah. Their reasons for being alone in a small, horribly flat was not something a four year old needed to know.

Senses honed, she watched as her daughter kicked the ball across the grass and towards the fountain. ”Alice, don’t run off!” Of course her demand was ignored and Lilah quickly jumped to follow her daughter, discarding her empty coffee cup in a nearby bin. Eyes never leaving her daughter’s small figure, she watched as the ball was caught by a hand and when she looked closer, she realised who it was. Peter. She hadn’t seen him in a while, only bumping into him sporadically. She watched as he interacted with Alice, his awkwardness noticeable for all to see. Smiling softly, she was warmed to see that her brother hadn’t changed at all. Nearing her daughter, who was now turning to point at her, Lilah shot Peter a small, careful smile as she walked towards him. ”Alice, I told you not to run off. You could have got lost.” Alice apologised, looking down at her feet, only looking up when Lilah ruffled her hair affectionately. Turning to Peter, she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. ”Hey Peter, it’s nice to see you.” She stopped momentarily, unsure what to say to him. Did she ask him how he was doing? How was work? Family was off limits of course, the situation already awkward enough. She hated that her brother was unsure whether he could talk to her, but it wasn’t his fault. Their parents took the blame for that. ”How have you been?” She asked him anyway, hoping he would stay and talk to her for just a little bit, even for Alice’s sake. ”Say hello to Uncle Peter, Alice.” The little girl obliged, politely saying ‘hello’ before playing with her ball again.

+tag:peter
+notes:outfit
BY MITZI

--------------------
user posted image

amazing set by beyond the rain@tda
PM
^
peter summers
 Posted: Apr 14 2017, 09:39 PM
Quote
has Rep: 4 pts
I bow down to pray I try to make the worse seem better Lord show me the way To cut through all this worn out leather I've got a hundred million reasons to walk away But baby I just need one good one to stay
age
22 YEARS OLD
job
student
daniel's pack
aff.
jade
alias
27
posts




I'm a war of head versus heart And it's always this way
Peter knew, of course, that Delilah was somewhere nearby. It would be ridiculous to assume that she wasn’t close to her child, and he didn’t know what to do whenever he did see her. He always felt strangely guilty, which was ridiculous, because it wasn’t like he had been the one to conceive a child out of wedlock; he had, in fact, done the complete opposite and met every expectation put upon him. Nevertheless, he tended to regard her as though she might suddenly click that he was an extension of his parents’ views and never want to speak to him again- which would be fine, as that was what he was supposed to do, although it never seemed that easy in practice. But it wasn’t his fault that he had bumped into Delilah and Alice; anyone could have been at the gardens that day.

Lilah arrived sooner than he’d thought she would- sooner than he’d planned- and he automatically squared his shoulders, forcing down any nervousness he might have at the prospective meeting; he had long since learnt that he did better when he didn’t think about anything but presenting the perfect front. “It’s nice to see you too,” he returned politely, even if it was actually vaguely confusing, really, to meet in these circumstances. It didn’t matter. He searched for an appropriate conversational topic (because this was really happening), but he couldn’t really fathom asking after Alice’s health or her job or anything like that; fortunately, Lilah got there first- clearly because she had more experience than him in these things, he decided.

“Oh, I’ve been… good. I’ve been studying and getting a job and stuff,” he explained, a little awkward still, but only because he had been raised not to boast about these things. It was different at the dinner table; they knew that he was preparing for post-graduate study, that he was working for his university. With Lilah, it felt like bragging: look at how my life is turning out because I listened to the right people. “And uh, nice to see you too, Alice,” he added with more of a smile in the child’s direction, even as she bounced away- he obviously couldn’t hold a child accountable for his own awkward feelings. “How have you been?” he added, back to Delilah.

lilah / clothes /

--------------------
and soon everybody will ask what became of you -
user posted image
'cause your heart was dying fast and you didn't know what to do.
PMEmail
^
delilah summers
 Posted: May 9 2017, 10:39 PM
Quote
has Rep: 4 pts
I couldn't tell you Why she felt that way She felt it everyday And I couldn't help her I just watched her make The same mistakes again
age
28 YEARS OLD
job
waitress
gerard's pack
aff.
vicki
alias
76
posts




cause i was raised to up
to be admired, to be noticed
Lilah couldn’t help but watch her brother, all but squirming as he stood there, making conversation. He’d always been the awkward child, but even that didn’t cover his inability to look her in the eye. She couldn’t blame him for anything though. She listened as he politely answered her questions, all the while keeping an eye to Alice in case she decided to run off again. “You’ve got a job? Well done, can I ask where? And how’s the studying been going?” She was desperate to keep the conversation going and although she didn’t want to bombard him with questions, her sisterly reaction was to praise him and show a genuine interest in how he was doing. She couldn’t help herself, but she knew he would have been reluctant to share, in case he came across as bragging but she knew he wasn’t. It wasn’t in his nature. She watched him talk to Alice, who seemed vaguely interested before chasing her ball again, but nearby this time. His question took her attention away from her little girl and she looked back at her brother. “I’ve been good, thanks.” She didn’t really know what to tell him. She’d been struggling a lot but she wouldn’t put that on him – he didn’t need to know. “Just getting on with things.”

She bit her lip as she followed Alice’s movements. “Do you want to sit down? I can grab us a coffee and we can talk for a bit? But only if you want to, I don’t want to make you feel awkward.” She hoped he would agree because he wanted to, and not because he felt he had too, but she wasn’t so sure. Maybe she was selfish for cornering him and putting him on the spot, but she had missed him and wanted to know what was happening in his life, and ask him about Esther too. “If you don’t want too, I won’t be upset. I understand, really I do.”

+tag:peter
+notes:outfit
BY MITZI

--------------------
user posted image

amazing set by beyond the rain@tda
PM
^
peter summers
 Posted: May 23 2017, 08:21 PM
Quote
has Rep: 4 pts
I bow down to pray I try to make the worse seem better Lord show me the way To cut through all this worn out leather I've got a hundred million reasons to walk away But baby I just need one good one to stay
age
22 YEARS OLD
job
student
daniel's pack
aff.
jade
alias
27
posts




I'm a war of head versus heart And it's always this way
Peter had somehow hoped that his vague answer might be enough, that Lilah would nod and say that this all made sense. Of course, that didn’t really happen but it wasn’t really a crime for her to know where he was working or what he studied nowadays. It had always been expected, of course, for him to sticking with further education; he was supposed to get a high-paying, high-ranking job in a firm somewhere- any less would be strange, and he was never that. “At my university, I work in the library,” he notified her, wondering if there was a way to make a librarian sound deeply important and serious. He had managed it before, but somehow it felt like he was telling Lilah that he was doing nothing more than sitting at a help desk. “It’s going well, though. I’m, uh, starting my masters in September,” he offered, unsure if Lilah even knew that he had gone with a mathematics degree in the end- would he have to mention this too? Surely she’d ask if she didn’t know what he was up to.

He wasn’t sure about all this sitting down for coffee business, at first. That seemed rather friendly, considering they weren’t supposed to be- but he also didn’t know how to say no, and he felt like this might assuage his guilty conscience a little, if he made more of an effort on the few occasions he did see Delilah and Alice. After a moment’s dithering, he made up his mind, and he nodded. “Alright,” he decided, although he had no idea where to get coffee so close to here- he assumed maybe there was a small truck of some sort, but he didn’t spend that much time in the area. “Here. I’ll pay and you get it?” he proposed, wondering if this somehow weirdly presumptuous of him, that he could afford to pay for two coffees and she, with one income and a child, couldn’t. “I can watch Alice, I swear. I help out with the youth group now,” he added, as though the fact that he was trusted with rowdy young teenagers on a regular basis was enough proof that he could be trusted with a toddler.

lilah / clothes /

--------------------
and soon everybody will ask what became of you -
user posted image
'cause your heart was dying fast and you didn't know what to do.
PMEmail
^
delilah summers
 Posted: May 24 2017, 08:47 PM
Quote
has Rep: 4 pts
I couldn't tell you Why she felt that way She felt it everyday And I couldn't help her I just watched her make The same mistakes again
age
28 YEARS OLD
job
waitress
gerard's pack
aff.
vicki
alias
76
posts




cause i was raised to up
to be admired, to be noticed
Lilah watched him hesitate at her question, seeing the cogs turning in his head but she didn’t push or pull a face. He would tell her if he wanted to. When he finally did, she smiled, noting that the job was entirely suited to her younger brother. “That’s really great Peter.” She felt a sense of pride wash over her, but sadness too. She hadn’t been there to see him go through his degree, to come home and tell them that he had a job while they sat around the dinner table. She’d missed so much but she couldn’t lament on that, she just hoped that she’d be able to keep up with what he was doing now. If he let her, that is. “Your masters? Wow, I’m impressed but I should have known. You always were the brains the Summers children, after all.” She smiled, glad that he was doing well before turning to watch Alice, who was a few yards away.

Once again, she saw him thinking her offer of coffee and called Alice over while he thought about her question. Fixing Alice’s hair, she smiled when Peter finally answered with a yes. Planning on taking him to the small coffee vendor by the fountain, she was about to walk towards the cart when Peter offered to pay for them. Turning, she shook her head. “Really, you don’t have to. Besides, you’re a student, aren’t you meant to be eternally poor?” She smiled widely, nodding at Peter’s offer to look after Alice. “As long as you don’t mind? And Peter, honestly, it wouldn’t matter if you didn’t work with the youth group. You’re her uncle, I trust you.” Making her way to coffee vendor, she ordered two regular flat whites, unsure what her brother usually drank and waited, turning to watch Peter with Alice, who was smiling at him. Smiling herself, she handed over the money and took the two drinks, making her way back to her brother and daughter. “Here you go,” she held out his cup, along with two sachets of sugar. “I didn’t know if you took sugar or not.”

+tag:peter
+notes:outfit
BY MITZI

--------------------
user posted image

amazing set by beyond the rain@tda
PM
^
peter summers
 Posted: Jun 17 2017, 11:55 PM
Quote
has Rep: 4 pts
I bow down to pray I try to make the worse seem better Lord show me the way To cut through all this worn out leather I've got a hundred million reasons to walk away But baby I just need one good one to stay
age
22 YEARS OLD
job
student
daniel's pack
aff.
jade
alias
27
posts




I'm a war of head versus heart And it's always this way
Despite Lilah’s clear pride at the fact that Peter was not only hired somewhere, but was going on to further studies, Peter couldn’t help the vague hint of awkwardness of somehow being the only smart one in the family. “Well,” he started, a little awkwardly but didn’t really know how to finish the sentence. He wanted to say that he couldn’t be, because Esther was doing wonderfully teaching at the Sunday school (an opportunity Peter had graciously passed on, deciding that he couldn’t have managed it) and Eva was designing her own clothes, and surely these skills were equally wonderful – but it was a bad thing to brag, he knew, and he couldn’t work out how to point these out without managing to sound far too prideful for his own liking. It didn’t matter much; the moment had passed, but it didn’t stop him from briefly reflecting on how he should be humble.

“That’s what the job’s for,” Peter shot back, sure that he did have enough to spare for coffee and it had very little to do with the job, and more to do with having a family who paid for these things; he couldn’t point this out so he was sure that saying that coffee was the sole reason he was going to get a job. Still, he was sure that despite the fact he didn’t spend eons of time with small children, Alice would be fine; she seemed cheerful, at least, and knew him, so he didn’t worry too much about something like spontaneous tears. He worried more about how youth group credentials apparently counted for less than familial relations, but put that thought aside, giving Delilah a small smile before he knelt down to greet Alice properly, assuring that she could kick her ball towards him and he could pass it back and it would be great fun.

By the time Delilah returned, they were at least attempting to play catch in a small area- Peter too afraid to let her wander off too far, pretty sure his credentials would be bought back into check if she was scooped up by someone else- and he accepted the coffee from her, pausing the game. “Just one,” he assured her, accepting both packets and managing, with some difficulty, to sort his coffee. “We were just… exercising. Alice tells me she’s in big school now,” he explained conversationally.

lilah / clothes /

--------------------
and soon everybody will ask what became of you -
user posted image
'cause your heart was dying fast and you didn't know what to do.
PMEmail
^
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